Sunday, August 22, 2010

I got your back boy

I came across many motivational quotes, lyrics which I like very much.

Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glories triumphs even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat.

And when you believe in possibility the world is yours no matter what.





Nothing is going to stop me now.
NIN





But I haven't seen Barbados
So I must get out of this

Me and a gun - Tori Amos

The dog days are over
The dog days are gone
Can you hear the horses
Cuz here they come

The horses are coming so you better run.
Dog days are over - Florence and the Machine

You got the love




I feel this song extremely motivational.

Sometimes I feel like throwing my hands up in the air
I know I can count on you
Sometimes I feel like saying "Lord I just don't care"
But you've got the love I need To see me through

When food is gone you are my daily meal
When friends are gone I know my saviour's love is real
Your love is real

You got the love
You got the love
You got the love
You got the love
You got the love
You got the love

Time after time I think "Oh Lord what's the use?"
Time after time it's just no good
Sooner or later in life, the things you love you loose
But you got the love I need to see me through.

You got the love
You got the love
You got the love
You got the love
You got the love
You got the love

Sometimes it seems that the going is just too rough
And things go wrong no matter what I do
Now and then it seems that life is just too much
But you've got the love I need to see me through











You don't know what is out their until you try
Is the glass half empty or half full?



But she is not making much money out of that is she? Well at least she is doing something she loves.

Quality of life is better then the quantity of
life.




Being content fulfills basic needs of being able to eat and have shelter. Being happy is going a step further and fulfilling the needs
to live ones passion.




We are our worse enemy. If you really want something, you have the ability to get it.
Danny Choo

Nothing leads to nothing, decision are incredibly important and lead to big things.
Hotaru



I look in the mirror and don't see a tired, failed, ugly wrench. I see a proud, beautiful, successful woman.
Cheryl Cole



I am successful, proud and I am me.
Listening to: The Source Ft. Candi Station - You got the love

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Me and my fucking gun

The song Big man and a gun from NIN's album The Downward Spiral.

I am a big man
(yes I am)
and I have a big gun
got me a big old Dick and I
I like to have fun
held against your forehead
I'll make you suck it
maybe I'll put a hole in your head
you know, just for the fuck of it
I can reduce you if I want
I can devour
I'm hard as fucking steel, and I’ve got the power
I'm every inch a man, and I'll show you somehow
me and my fucking gun
nothing can stop me now
shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot
I'm going to come all over you
me and my fucking gun
me and my fucking gun


I really love this song. It is aggressive and love the anger in Trent's voice. I love the aggressive tone especially in the last lines.

me and my fucking gun
me and my fucking gun


The song is actually about narcissism but it is the perfect response to Tori's Me and a gun I say every woman and man who was raped can relate to this song. It is another powerful piece. For all we know maybe this song was written in response to Me and a gun.

Listening to: NIN - Big man with a gun

Saturday, August 14, 2010

I am a big man yes I am and I have a big gun.

5am
Friday morning
Thursday night
Far from sleep
I'm still up and driving
Can't go home
obviously
So I'll just change direction
Cause they'll soon konw where I live
And I wanna live

Got a full tank and some chips
It was me and a gun
And a man on my back
And I sang "holy holy" as he buttoned down his pants
You can laugh
It's kind of funny things you think
at times like these
Like I haven't seen Barbados
So I must get out of this

Yes I wore a slinky red thing
Does that mean I should spread
For you, your friends your father, Mr. Ed

Me and a gun
and a man
On my back
But I haven't seen Barbados
So I must get out of this
Yes I wore a slinky red thing
Does that mean I should spread
For you, your friends your father, Mr. Ed
And I know what this means
Me and Jesus a few years back
Used to hang and he said
"It's your choice babe just remember
I don't think you'll be back in 3 days time
So you choose well"
Tell me what's right
Is it my right to be on my stomach
of Fred's Seville

Me and a gun
and a man
On my back
But I haven't seen Barbados
So I must get out of this

And do you know Carolina
Where the biscuits are soft and sweet
These things go through you head
When there's a man on your back
And you're pushed flat on your stomach
It's not a classic cadillac

Me and a gun
and a man
On my back
But I haven't seen Barbados
So I must get out of this


As a cosplayer and who enjoys modelling as a hobbie, I really find song lyrics inspiring. If I am researching a character to play I would listen to the song which reminds me of the character and when it comes to a cosplay photoshoot or just for a general modelling shoot I would like to apply song lyrics for ideas because they can represent the harshness of society, depression or happiness and that was the point of my previous post, it as also for inspiration.

Following from my previous post about the connection between Trent and Tori, I will talk about this a little further. Tori's song Me and I gun has to be one of the most memorable and controversial songs I have ever listened to. The lyrics really stand out to me. The song is about Tori's experience when she was raped at the age of 21. She was performing at a bar and a man took an interest in her and offered to give her a lift home. He raped her and planned to gang rape her but she got away. What is interesting is in the song she had a gun but in reality she had a knife.

How am I alive to tell you this tale when he was ready to slice me up? In the song I say it was 'Me and a Gun' but it wasn't a gun. It was a knife he had. And the idea was to take me to his friends and cut me up, and he kept telling me that, for hours.

I was psychologically mutilated that night and that now I'm trying to put the pieces back together again. Through love, not hatred. And through my music. My strength has been to open again, to life, and my victory is the fact that, despite it all, I kept alive my vulnerability.

Tori Amos

The lyrics frighten me as I see abit of myself through these lyrics.

Me and Jesus a few years back
Used to hang and he said
"It's your choice babe just remember
I don't think you'll be back in 3 days time
So you choose well"
Tell me what's right


I sometimes don't know what is right, what is wrong and I haven’t turned my back on religion well ok I rarely go to mass but I believe in guidance.

This really stands out to me.

Yes I wore a slinky red thing
Does that mean I should spread
For you, your friends your father, Mr. Ed


Just because I wear a slinky cosplay, dress moe, dress in Japanese school girl uniforms does that mean I should spread? Everything and anything will attract the wrong attention but should that stop us? I am sorry God, mother, father and siblings but I have come out a lot over the years and acting in this manner is who I am, it is not about attracting the wrong attention but it is the fanboy world and as I get deeper into cosplay I fear I will but I will be careful.xx

She expresses such irony in these lyrics.

And do you know Carolina
Where the biscuits are soft and sweet
These things go through you head
When there's a man on your back
And you're pushed flat on your stomach
It's not a classic cadillac


Not the kinda things to be thinking about when you are pushed flat on your stomach. Lets think about abit of fantasy as it eases the pain.

But I haven't seen Barbados
So I must get out of this


To me I interpret these lyrics to getting to my own ambitions and goals. For years and for a long time I saw myself going no where, no motivation and had no goals. I really didn’t know what I wanted to do in life and now coming to terms with this, these above lyrics motivate me. I haven’t seen Japan so I must get out of this and sort myself out. What I find very haunting about this song is the way Tori sings is. There is no music just her depersonalised voice. She sings this song with such weakness. Listening to this song gives me shivers and it is the type of song I couldn’t listen to in public transport as it is very deep. I can picture her sitting worthless on the coach, drinking whiskey, crying to her self, and thinking of the harsh memories which will never leave her. The song is the depersonalised of the human self. In the end she gives hope that she will get out of this. We all have dark periods but there is hope. I hope to give other people hope through my pictures.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

The Professional Widow

Slag pit
Stag shit
Honey bring it close to my lips
Yes
Don't blow those brains yet
We gotta be big boy
We gotta be big
Starfucker just like my Daddy
Just like my Daddy selling his baby
Just like my Daddy
Gonna strike a deal made him feel
Like a congressman
It runs in the family

Rest your shoulder Peaches and Cream
Everywhere a Judas as fast as you can see
Beautiful angel
Calling "We got every re-run of Muhammad Ali"

Prism perfect
Honey bring it close to your lips
Yes
What is termed a landslide of principle
Proportion boy it better be big boy
Starfucker just like my Daddy
Just like my Daddy selling his baby
Just like my daddy
Gonna strike a deal make him feel
Like a Congressman
It runs in the family
Mother Mary
China white
Brown may be sweeter
She will supply
Mother Mary
China white
Brown may be sweeter
She will supply
She will supply
She will supply
She will supply





The lyrics are from Professional Widow from Tori Amos. I tend to enjoy analysing a lot of things, I like to analyse song lyrics which I like. I was listening to this song and started reading up stuff about it as Tori is known to have deep song lyrics and I find the lyrics alluring. The whole thing is like a conspiracy really. The "professional widow" is rumoured to be Courtney Love which makes a little sense as some of the lyrics kinda remind me of Courtney.

We gotta be big boy
We gotta be big
Starfucker just like my Daddy
Just like my Daddy selling his baby
Just like my Daddy
Gonna strike a deal made him feel
Like a congressman
It runs in the family


It is like you can see Tori's anger with Courtney here and;

Gonna strike a deal make him feel
She will supply


It has been rumoured that Courtney paid someone she knew to kill Kurt Cobain from Nirvana. That came to mind when looking at the above lyrics after reading into this. I really don't know if it is true that she killed Kurt as I never looked into it but if the professional widow is suppose to be about Courtney and the song is about her that is what makes the song more interesting. Also what I found striking about this song is the connection between Tori and Trent Reznor from NIN. With reference to wiki it said that the song maybe highlights the broken friendship between Tori and Trent because in the song Tori used the word "starfucker" which NIN had a song tilted Starfuckers Inc from the Fragile album. Apparently according to Wiki, Trent blamed Courtney for destroying his and Tori's friendship. It has been rumoured that at the time of Kurt's death Courtney was sleeping with Trent which Trent denies. I don't know if that is even true and to be honest I really don't want to know. It really is a circle and it all connects.

What I also find alluring about the lyrics in this song is the whole thing of Tori going against religion;

It runs in the family
Mother Mary
China white
Brown may be sweeter
She will supply
Mother Mary
China white
Brown may be sweeter
She will supply


Listen to her song, God and perhaps some of her other stuff and you will see what I mean. Hell maybe this is all my own interpretation. It is really hard to know what Tori's lyrics are about as we don't know what is going on with her. I just find this song fascinating in parts because of the connection with Trent Reznor and I will talk more about that in other posts because it really interests me as I am big fan of both artists.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Hidden Innocence



Photo by Denis - http://pix.ie/pullandbang

Listening to: The Doors

Monday, August 2, 2010

Reminicing Last Summer Part 1



This is a collection of photos my sister took of me while we went for a stroll in Ard Gillan, it was out of pure random. These photos were taken last year. That was such a fun day and the photos turned out lovely. The setting was ideal for my outfit being sweet lolita we will say. I treasure these photos.







This is my favourite out of the collection. It is so gothic and haunting.











It is so magical.











Helter Skelter









The rest of the photos are in the cut. There are just way too many to upload them all but the rest are good too, so do have a look if you can. :-) I see my personality comes out in these photos too.

Listening to: My Ruin - Terror

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Lets make it interesting.

Art a concept that so fascinates me. I came across these images awhile ago and find them striking.




Image 1: an album cover from one of John Lennon's albums.



Image 2: a front cover of a film. I have no nothing about this film or haven't seen it.

Finally



Image 3: The front cover of the End of Evangelion.

So what do these three images have in common? That face. Who copied who? That I don't know. I have seen many other artforms which has a big, pale, face coming out of the ground in the distance. When I saw image 1 and image 2 they straight away reminded me of the End of Evangelion cover art. I really want to know who came up with this idea and where did the original come from. It just goes to show it is impossible for art or anything to be original as somewhere along the lines or in the deep past it has been done before.

I find image 1 and image 3 bearing a big resemblance not only with the face but if you look at both of them closely, the landscape is similar, image 1 has a man standing in the front of the image facing the viewer. Image 3 has two people both looking at the face. Also the face in Image 1 and Image 3 are looking in opposite directions. In fact image 1 is mirroring image 3 with the people in the foreground of both images looking in the opposite way. It is hard to tell if Anno or the person who designed the EOE cover art got this idea from Lennon's cover art or other or maybe it is just pure coincidence.

It is interesting.

Listening to: Jack Of Jill - Angel's Fuck